Caught "Bean" Good Jar

This is a great motivation for the kids in our family to work together for a common goal.  It also helps Mom to practice giving genuine, positive feedback.  For each, pleasing behavior, the child is complimented.  For instance, I might say, "Thank you Princess for getting to the table quickly.  Why don't you put a bean in the jar."  or "Thank you Captain for working through that challenging math word problem. I think you deserve 2 beans for that effort!" Sometimes, they will say to me, "Mom, you've been really patient.  We think you should get a bean too."  When the bean jar is filled, we get to do something fun together. 

Parenting lesson learned from a speeding ticket

Have you ever been pulled over by a police officer for speeding? Well last month, I was. He taught me a thing or two about a thing or two, but its not what you think. Of course, the experience was a reminder that there isn’t any place that I need to be that requires me to drive like a bat out of he**. But more importantly, he was the perfect model for properly disciplining my kids.

He pulls me over and says to me:

1. Ma’am can I have your drivers license and registration?

2. Do you know why I pulled you over today?

3. You were exceeding the speed limit by 10 mph. I’m going to write you a ticket.

4. Have a nice day.

He didn’t pull me over and yell at me:

1. What were you thinking?!

2. Do you know you were driving like a bat out of he**?!

3. I can’t believe I have to deal with this today?!

4. I’m gonna write you this ticket because you don’t deserve to have a license to drive!

He was calm & unemotional as he dealt out my "punishment". That is the model I will strive to use the next time my 6 year old watches his 2 year old brother sprinkle an entire container of salt all over the laminate floor and then joins him in "surfing" through the house on the grit. ; )

I just did a web search and found an article that explains what I learned and more. Here is a link to the article.